Hello readers, searching for this topic definitely means you have an inkling of your relationship going awry. Now what is a toxic relationship? A relationship where you are left disillusioned and in utter confusion. Things are not the same. You find yourself imagining scenarios and feel tethered out of situations. You find yourself feeling sad or end up crying after a small discussion. You find it appalling how a small discussion end up in arguments. Further you feel where did you go wrong and yes, it’s a dreadful feeling to have! Folks here are a few signs I am laying down signs which indicates that you are in a toxic relationship :
Now this situation can be seen by close friends and well wishers but not yourself. Your partner seems to control you and your life. They keep checking up on your emotions whether they have a full control or not. Your toxic partner will not be happy to see you design your own plans, create your identity or following your passion. They will be utmost satisfied when they have a grip on your emotions and your decisions. In a toxic relationship, the partner doesn’t like someone else to be important in their lover’s life. They start to retaliate or threaten to end the relationship which leaves the loving partner surprised. They feel that it’s only them who have a right over you. You have a feeling of being caged!
Misunderstandings and constant fights
The biggest early sign of toxic relationship is constant fight. You wonder how a normal discussion turn into a heated argument. You and your partner are no longer on the same page on any matter. This happens when you have unreasonable expectations of each other. Constant fights repels people and healthy relationships. Undue expectations gives rise to blame game and hostility. Hostility keeps cracking the trust and reliability making the relationship toxic. Constant misunderstanding on every topic is a huge sign of a bad relationship.
Uncertainty in future
You start feeling uncertain as to how things will work out or whether good times are even a possibility. You can’t envision a picture with them anymore the way you used to do. When you discuss about your future plans, it seems like a herculean task of picturing it together. You cringe at the thought of it. You no longer feel that it will be a possibility since you are no longer sure. A toxic relationship will make you think twice about the future with your partner. You are anxious all the time. You have wrenched gut when you think what if I have to stay with them for whole life?
You no more share your daily news with your partner. You feel apprehensive about sharing story and experience of your daily life. You keep quiet when you are around them. A toxic partner makes you defensive. You find yourself being blamed by them for any mishappenings. And nobody likes the feeling of being defensive. Hence you start opting to keep mum about issues of daily life.
This is what happens when you are in a toxic relationship. Such relationship makes you shut rather than open up to avoid ugly situation. Your guards are constantly up and you find yourself defensive. When You feel a constant pressure of obligation and keeping silent, it is a sign that you are maintaining a toxic relation.
Absence of emotional availability
You no longer gel along on emotional level in a toxic relationship. Infact the cause of bad relationship begins when your partner stops sharing that special bond with you. They act suspicious and goofy. Certain news comes hit on you from other sources rather than your partner. And the confrontations turns ugly when you pry. They start snapping at you. This brings a feeling of insecurity and trust issues which I wrote about in previous blog.
The fear of being cheated brings insecurity turning relationship toxic eventually.
Physical Abuse and Torture
No relationship thrives on abuse at any level!
Abuse of any sort is a huge sign of a toxic relationship.
Your partner will abuse you physically in order to gain control over you. A physically abused person no longer goes against the wishes of the abusive partner. They start living life according to the convenience of their abusive partner. No longer the relationship is based on mutual love and understanding. But it is based on the whims and fancy of their abusive partner. The toxic partner will continuously threaten to end the relationship. Such relations feed on the insecurity and lack of self worth of the partner turning it into horrible toxic relationship over time.
Mental Abuse and Harassment
A relationship definitely can be termed as toxic when your partner shows you down or treats you a as a nobody. They lack the empathy and instead blames you for anything and everything. Wherever you go whatever you do, it us justified as negative by your loved one. They blame you for seeking happiness in other pursuits or relationships. Such acts come under mental abuse. Mental abuse is a wide topic to cover. You can consider your relationship toxic when you question yourself and your actions after you cry copious tears just for being yourself. Folks, never ever be sorry for being yourself. Get out of this toxic relationship.
No respect for Privacy
A great relationship sustains on love and mutual respect. An insecure partner won’t let you do your own thing. They will constantly nag you to control your actions. They will keep questioning your intentions. No matter how faithful you are , you receive a feeling of inadequacy and never enough for them. You are questioned for your fair judgements. A toxic partner will not bother if you are on another important call, extra office hours, outing with friends or for your social circle. Your partner will use and dispose you according to their convenience. Even a single minute call on your phone will irritate them. They will find everything unimportant related to your life. They don’t respect your family, your obligations and financial planning even. Everything to them seems useless. Such a behaviour is common to see in a toxic relationship.
Dear readers, the reasons I have laid are the result of my churning emotions I went through during a toxic relationship. My well wishers pointed out how I was a victim of a horrible toxic relationship.
How to fix A toxic relationship? Now I would’nt say that you must leave abad relationship if you see these certain signs. Things can be sorted out with clear discussion and revealing your true intentions with your partner. In severe cases, you must seek a counsellor or an experiencedelderly person who is willing to guide and offer assistance. But in some cases it is best to End a bad relationship if the pattern keeps recurring in spite of putting efforts. You must leave a bad relationship.
Everybody has a right to a loving relationships making each other a better person. A relationship is only good if it must inspire you do to good things in life and bring that emotional stability which everyone craves for. So darlings, if you find yourself crying frequently , it’s time to question the base of this relationship and if it is even a benefit to both of you. There is no need to endure a toxic relationship. It will cost you your health, mental peace and happiness and it may even cost you your dear life! So do yourself a favor by introspecting the reliability of this relationship. Keep loving, Keep Living. There is so much this world has to offer. Toxic relationship is the last thing you need. Isn’t it?